My kitchen faucet has seen its day. It’s white plastic, ugly, stained, and when
you pull out the handle to use the spray function, it won’t retract. If you think it has retracted, but it’s not
locked in place, it falls down, spraying you and the entire kitchen with
water. It completely sucks and needs to
be replaced. Here is the story of why I
just keep living with it:
If you give a mommy a faucet, she is going to want a new
sink to go with it. A sink that is not
scratched up and stained, a sink that is not white, a sink in which she can
dump out half a cup of coffee without having to clean the resulting coffee
stain with Comet or a Magic Eraser.
If you give a mommy a sink, she is going to want new
countertops to replace the old laminate ones that have that telltale brown
laminate seam, and have bumpy drips of superglue from the messy fixing of
broken toys.
If you give a mommy new countertops, she would really prefer
not to put them on the existing cabinets, which are dated country oak, and not
her style at all, and which have curved panel doors that, even if painted, will
never look modern.
If you give a mommy new cabinets, it really doesn’t make
sense to put them on the cracked tile floor, because the flooring goes under
the cabinets, and wasn’t installed correctly, leading to a long crack that runs
through several tiles and gets longer each year. Also, the floor is white and shows every single freaking drip and
piece of dust.
And that is why I have a non-functional kitchen faucet. The end.
